Lance Lynn is a big old hairy penis

So he's got a 1.42 ERA, big whoop. Wainwright had a 9.88 before yesterday's game and he only gave up one run through six. By that logic, The Cubs should win 9.88 to zero today.

Lance Lynn yawning at my logic

Anyway, the headline of the post says it all, I just wanted to show you a picture of this fucker. Look at him, you just know he's into his sister. 

Preview: Cubs vs CardinLOLs 4/25

Chris Volstad is pitching so that sucks, but we already won the series! So...

WHO

GIVES

A

FUCK.

Plus, whoever is pitching for the Cardinals today sucks too. Or at least I assume he does because his name is Lynn.